Monster Dog

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Dice Reviews – Monster Dog

From the man who directed Troll 2 I bring you Monster Dog, starring Alice Cooper! We’re in B movie country, lads…

Hey, guys! My name is Dice Rollen & today I’m giving you a slightly different review. This time I’m only reviewing one thing & that thing is considered to be a bad horror movie. I plan to review other terrible horror movies individually in the future so feel free to give me suggestions on some that I should check out.
Now interestingly enough, this movie that we’ll be looking into today called Monster Dog is one that I’ve already talked a bit about. It was on my first WTF horror movies list that I made.

This is a 1984 film that was directed by Claudio Fragasso in Spain. It stars Alice Cooper who plays a rockstar going back to his childhood home to film music videos. However once he & his crew arrives they find there are strange & deadly things happening in the area.

The movie begins with Alice Cooper’s Identity Crisis before it switches to a van with Mr. Cooper himself & his crew. Only his name in this movie isn’t Alice Cooper, it’s Vincent Raven. Let’s be honest here, that’s about the most teen goth name anyone could come up with. Another weird thing is that even though this movie was filmed with all the actors speaking english it was still dubbed over…by english speaking people.
Oh no! You dubbed over Alice Cooper? Hell no, bitch! I’m out!

So Vincent & his crew are driving back to his childhood home which he hasn’t been to in 20 years to shoot some music videos in the hope that it will inspire them. We’re introduced to Jos, who is the caretaker of the house, as he prepares for their arrival. But he has to stop for a moment so he can play into the horror cliché of the window not being locked so the wind is fucking with it. Then he steps outside because he hears howling & barking.
Good idea, kids…
There he’s greeted by a nice diverse group of possibly rabid canines. Meanwhile the sheriff & deputy of the town complain about the weather while Vincent pulls up on their road block. Because apparently a pack of rabid dogs calls for multiple road blocks? The sheriff & his deputy explain whats been going on involving the dogs killing people in the area & traumatize the blonde before they let them through. The sheriff also mentions that the people in the town hadn’t forgotten about what happened to Vincent’s father which leads Vincent’s girlfriend to ask him about. And he responds with a solid fuck that.
The sheriff & the deputy hear some rustling in the bushes & proceed to go investigate. You know what that means! They’re dead. One hundred percent dead.

Vincent hits one of the dogs & proceeds to hit it again…with a rock. Cause it’s a mercy killing, right? An old man appears from the woods to cause some more trauma & tells them that they fucked up & they’re all going to die before ominously disappearing back into the woods. Vincent & Sandra go after the man & come across the monster dog. At which point they decide that’s enough exploring for one night & haul ass back to the van, miraculously unscathed by comparison of the sheriff & the deputy. They arrive at the mansion & look for Jos, but he’s nowhere to be found.
Because he was fuckin’ stupid & got eaten!

And bless Vincent because he’s the only smart one who grabs a gun immediately after entering a creepy old house.
You know I have to say for being the caretaker of this place, Jos did a shit job when it came to dusting & getting rid of cobwebs.
And in the kitchen everyone eats the sandwiches Jos made while Angela proceeds to be the life of the party by telling everyone they’re in grave danger here. So everyone goes to sleep & Angela has a nightmare where everyone is dead & the creepy old guy from before stalks her. She finds Vincent, but he turns out to be a hideously deformed ferret.
I mean werewolf!

Vincent goes back to reading a book about werewolves & Sandra criticizes him for believing in them. He explains that his father had a condition that may have been described as lycanthropy & the towns people killed him because they thought he was the cause of the murders at the time. Sandra goes back to bed but stops at the family portrait on the wall & sees what appears to be the same monster dog that she & Vincent saw before in the bushes of the painting.
Next we get a montage of the group messing around & setting up for a music video.

While everyone’s shooting the music video for See Me in the Mirror Angela notices a silhouette of someone at the window above them. This turns out to Jos as his dead body falls on top of Angela. Vincent & the other go to investigate what happened to Jos & find signs of a struggle. Meanwhile Angela’s hallucinating & wanders off into the woods alone. So the guys grab some guns & Vincent goes out to find Angela while the others stay in the mansion. Sandra tries to call the police but the locals have cut the line as they apparently believe that once again a Roberts is responsible for the killings.
Doesn’t it make you so glad that we have cellphones in case of a crazy mob?

While everyone’s packing up to leave a car pulls up & out come some armed & crazy locals. They try to convince the group to let them in saying they knew Vincent’s father. Eventually they do let the hobos with guns into the house & what a surprise they end up turning on the group & taking their guns away. The leader of this group tells them that they believe Vincent is to blame for all the deaths lately & he plans to kill him just like he did Vincent’s father. Eventually Vincent finds Angela & they return to the mansion only for Angela to be shot with the bullet that was intended for Vincent. Vincent takes off to the roof with three of the four locals chasing after him while fourth stays behind to get rid of the others. However Sandra stabs a fire poker through his foot & takes his gun away.

And up on the roof Vincent shoots one of the men. The others decide to go after Vincent to try to help him & a pack of dogs get into the house as soon as they open the door. Vincent kills the other two locals & the dogs go after the fourth. Dumbass over here tries to throw a lantern at one of the dogs & this literally backfires on him. Vincent’s group tries to fend off the dogs & the monster appears breaking the door down. Sandra & Mary Lou run up the stairs while guy number 2 is killed by the monster dog.
Then Vincent appears &…they take a nap…

Vincent discovers that the pack of dogs suddenly seem to be very calm & not aggressive at all. So he, Sandra & Mary Lou decide to take the locals’ car. But small problem, they don’t have the key. Vincent & Sandra go back into the house & up to the roof to try to find it. And turns out the leader wasn’t actually dead as he grabs Vincent, Sandra shoots him & they get back to the car with the keys. They drive off believing that everything’s okay now.
Can you guess…go ahead just try to guess what happens.

Yep, Mary Lou is dead & the monster dog in the back seat & proceeds to bite Vincent. So Sandra bales out while Vincent crashes the car. Sandra hobbles around trying to find Vincent but the creepy man from before finds her & tells her that Vincent has taken his place. Sandra finds Vincent who tells her to shoot him as he’s begun to transform. With some hesitation & low budget special effects she does thus ending the rein of the monster dog.
After that we get a mild plunge into insanity, some more Identity Crisis & the movie ends.

Okay so there are some plot holes to talk about here. Like when the leader of the group of locals is talking about how he’s going to kill Vincent with a silver bullet. Yeah, right okay. But then Vincent is able to kill the old creepy dude & Sandra kills him. Were all of their guns loaded with silver bullets? If not, the leader lied. Or they’re not really dead. I…

The plot itself is shaky & nothing new, the twists & turns you can see coming a mile away. But hey, what do you want from a B horror movie like this?

Aside from that let’s talk about acting. As far as a B level movie goes, this certainly wasn’t the worst thing I’ve had to witness. As a matter of fact, as a Cooper fan I found it enjoyable. Everybody did a decent job, not great, but passable. And given that this was sort of Alice Cooper’s come back into acting after his absence/recovery from drinking & cocaine I’d say it wasn’t bad on his part either.

As a whole I don’t think this movie was meant to be taken seriously, especially since Alice Cooper himself has said that he enjoys horrible C & D level horror movies. This was more or less for shits & giggles & the love of cheesy horror films.
If you’re an Alice Cooper fan then I’d say you should watch this movie even though the whole voice dubbing thing was unnecessary & somewhat of a turn off. And if you’re not a Cooper fan than I think you could still get some laughs & enjoyment out of it just like you would any other rock star featuring horror movie.

So I hope you enjoyed this video, if you did give it a like to let me know. And don’t forget to leave a comment down below telling me what you thought of this movie & suggestions for other bad horror movies you want me to review. Also don’t forget to share this video to help the channel grow & subscribe for more videos like this!

See ya later!

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